Pages

Tuesday, 9 April 2013

22 Things Happy People Do Differently


This article is from Chiara Fucarino. Enjoy!

There are two types of people in the world: those who choose to be happy, and those who choose to be unhappy. Contrary to popular belief, happiness doesn’t come from fame, fortune, other people, or material possessions. Rather, it comes from within. The richest person in the world could be miserable while a homeless person could be right outside, smiling and content with their life. Happy people are happy because they make themselves happy. They maintain a positive outlook on life and remain at peace with themselves.

The question is: how do they do that?

It’s quite simple. Happy people have good habits that enhance their lives. They do things differently. Ask any happy person, and they will tell you that they …

1. Don’t hold grudges.

Happy people understand that it’s better to forgive and forget than to let their negative feelings crowd out their positive feelings. Holding a grudge has a lot of detrimental effects on your wellbeing, including increased depression, anxiety, and stress. Why let anyone who has wronged you have power over you? If you let go of all your grudges, you’ll gain a clear conscience and enough energy to enjoy the good things in life.

2. Treat everyone with kindness.

Did you know that it has been scientifically proven that being kind makes you happier? Every time you perform a selfless act, your brain produces serotonin, a hormone that eases tension and lifts your spirits. Not only that, but treating people with love, dignity, and respect also allows you to build stronger relationships.

3. See problems as challenges.

The word “problem” is never part of a happy person’s vocabulary. A problem is viewed as a drawback, a struggle, or an unstable situation while a challenge is viewed as something positive like an opportunity, a task, or a dare. Whenever you face an obstacle, try looking at it as a challenge.

4. Express gratitude for what they already have.

There’s a popular saying that goes something like this: “The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.” You will have a deeper sense of contentment if you count your blessings instead of yearning for what you don’t have.

5. Dream big.

People who get into the habit of dreaming big are more likely to accomplish their goals than those who don’t. If you dare to dream big, your mind will put itself in a focused and positive state.

6. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Happy people ask themselves, “Will this problem matter a year from now?” They understand that life’s too short to get worked up over trivial situations. Letting things roll off your back will definitely put you at ease to enjoy the more important things in life.

7. Speak well of others.

Being nice feels better than being mean. As fun as gossiping is, it usually leaves you feeling guilty and resentful. Saying nice things about other people encourages you to think positive, non-judgmental thoughts.

8. Never make excuses.

Benjamin Franklin once said, “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” Happy people don’t make excuses or blame others for their own failures in life. Instead, they own up to their mistakes and, by doing so, they proactively try to change for the better.

9. Get absorbed into the present.

Happy people don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. They savor the present. They let themselves get immersed in whatever they’re doing at the moment. Stop and smell the roses.

10. Wake up at the same time every morning.
Have you noticed that a lot of successful people tend to be early risers? Waking up at the same time every morning stabilizes your circadian rhythm, increases productivity, and puts you in a calm and centered state.

11. Avoid social comparison.
Everyone works at his own pace, so why compare yourself to others? If you think you’re better than someone else, you gain an unhealthy sense of superiority. If you think someone else is better than you, you end up feeling bad about yourself. You’ll be happier if you focus on your own progress and praise others on theirs.

12. Choose friends wisely.
Misery loves company. That’s why it’s important to surround yourself with optimistic people who will encourage you to achieve your goals. The more positive energy you have around you, the better you will feel about yourself.

13. Never seek approval from others.
Happy people don’t care what others think of them. They follow their own hearts without letting naysayers discourage them. They understand that it’s impossible to please everyone. Listen to what people have to say, but never seek anyone’s approval but your own.

14. Take the time to listen.
Talk less; listen more. Listening keeps your mind open to others’ wisdoms and outlooks on the world. The more intensely you listen, the quieter your mind gets, and the more content you feel.

15. Nurture social relationships.

A lonely person is a miserable person. Happy people understand how important it is to have strong, healthy relationships. Always take the time to see and talk to your family, friends, or significant other.

16. Meditate.

Meditating silences your mind and helps you find inner peace. You don’t have to be a zen master to pull it off. Happy people know how to silence their minds anywhere and anytime they need to calm their nerves.

17. Eat well.
Junk food makes you sluggish, and it’s difficult to be happy when you’re in that kind of state. Everything you eat directly affects your body’s ability to produce hormones, which will dictate your moods, energy, and mental focus. Be sure to eat foods that will keep your mind and body in good shape.

18. Exercise.

Studies have shown that exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft does. Exercising also boosts your self-esteem and gives you a higher sense of self-accomplishment.

19. Live minimally.

Happy people rarely keep clutter around the house because they know that extra belongings weigh them down and make them feel overwhelmed and stressed out. Some studies have concluded that Europeans are a lot happier than Americans are, which is interesting because they live in smaller homes, drive simpler cars, and own fewer items.

20. Tell the truth.

Lying stresses you out, corrodes your self-esteem, and makes you unlikeable. The truth will set you free. Being honest improves your mental health and builds others’ trust in you. Always be truthful, and never apologize for it.

21. Establish personal control.
Happy people have the ability to choose their own destinies. They don’t let others tell them how they should live their lives. Being in complete control of one’s own life brings positive feelings and a great sense of self-worth.

22. Accept what cannot be changed.

Once you accept the fact that life is not fair, you’ll be more at peace with yourself. Instead of obsessing over how unfair life is, just focus on what you can control and change it for the better.

Sunday, 7 April 2013

Age Only A Mental Barrier?


To look good and feel good is work. To look great and feel great is a full-time job. There is no cheating! It's daily! Minute-by-minute, second-by-second. This is the process I love and love to work at. The reward is liking myself and living a creative life. I will turn 90 on April 4 and hope I can still create this in 10 years time.
Life in itself is a challenge and you can either, accept it and take action, or you can sit and do nothing. My advice is there is only one winner: accept the challenge, take action and get on with your life no matter what age.
I'm not aware of being 90. I'm aware of feeling physically as good as I have ever felt and mentally even better. I practice dance and workout every day. This body has to know who's boss and being 90 and feeling 20 is as good as it gets! People ask me all the time what's my secret. I tell them move, learn and listen.
The reward is a healthy body and mind. I'm totally selfish in that me and my body and mind are one. We are partners and we work play and live as one. So if that is so, we can't sit around and think about tomorrow. Our body and mind has to be trained from the first breath, otherwise it's down hill all the way. Numbers and dwelling on age is a trap. There is no age, it's living each moment to it's fullest.
I started my own fashion label at 50, became a musician and learned Italian and French in my 70s, took tango and trapeze at 80 and walked into my first yoga class at 85. So, if you think you're old, think again!
What inspires me is the process of learning. Inspiration creates creativity and creativity creates a better life. I like experimenting and have no fear of trying something new, so flying high on a trapeze at 80 was never a question. Becoming a musician late in my life was not accidental. It was meant to be.
I love to move and exercise, so my work out regime consists of yoga, tango, jump rope, hiking with my poodle Nicko and playing tennis.
Yoga gives you a life you didn't have yesterday. It's a wakeup call to every cell in your body. Every muscle sits up and pays attention. I live to do yoga and I do it to live.
Do every pose as good as you can and then do it a little better. I have arthritis in my spine, but I can do a full back bend, headstand and splits.
Dance has always been my passion. I had my first ballet lesson at 14 and knew then dance would be my life. Four years later I was performing in a night club in Boston and soon after that I was performing on Broadway.
Bloomer Girl, Oklahoma, Brigadoon, High Button Shoes and Kismet. I then went to Rio de Janeiro with the Ballet Russe De Monte Carlo. So from age 18, work was constant and life was and is really good. I'm still working creatively and love what I'm doing and have no intention of changing direction.
I have realized, that anything is possible, if you like who you are and what you do. Yes, anything is possible and even probable.
If you don't train the body every day it withers. If you don't train the mind everyday, you lose it. That's why I learned Italian and French, as learning a language is a great mental exercise. I then challenged myself to write music. I wrote the music and lyrics for my first song "Free Fall," which was inspired by flying on the trapeze. A CD followed with 12 songs: Scenes Of Passion. And then six tangos for Tango Insomnia. I now write short songs daily about things I do.
Tango dancing is a fantastic exercise, as it's physical and emotional. It's the only time, when I turn off my mind and just dance, so I am in the moment. To look effortless in dance is sheer beauty. That's my desire. I'm still performing, as it keeps my body in tune, is good for my memory and it makes my life a joy. A triple Boleo in the air would make my journey complete. Marcos (my teacher/dance partner) says it will take two years. I tell him, I have time!
I admit, I'm driven but I'm driven by desire and that's the formula. Desire is so powerful, like you are propelled as if from a canon. Desire to me is the driving force, but action is the result.
Working and accomplishing something mental and physical makes my day worth living and suddenly there is a break through, another step on the ladder. I don't give up. The sun and moon are there for everyone. The journey is worth it! This trip has been good to me and I wouldn't trade it for all the stars in the universe.
There is a way to beat the clock. Stay fit and enjoy the journey. Accept the challenge and go for it!
That's what I did!
By Phyllis Sues

Friday, 5 April 2013

Do Magic Mushrooms Alter Personality For The Better?


Forty-five years after Timothy Leary, the apostle of drug-induced mysticism, urged his hippie followers to "turn on, tune in and drop out", researchers have found that magic mushrooms do change a user's personality – for the better.

The fungi have long been known for their psychedelic effects, but far from damaging the brain, the hallucinogenic drug they contain enhances feelings and aesthetic sensibilities, scientists say. The study, at Johns Hopkins University of Medicine in Baltimore, found that a single dose of psilocybin, the active ingredient in magic mushrooms, was enough to cause positive effects for up to a year.

"Psilocybin can facilitate experiences that change how people perceive themselves and their environment," said Roland Griffiths, a study author and professor of psychiatry and behavioural science at Johns Hopkins. "That's unprecedented."

Users who had a "mystical experience" while taking the drug showed increases in a personality trait dubbed "openness", one of the five major traits used in psychology to describe human personality. Openness is associated with imagination, artistic appreciation, feelings, abstract ideas and general broad-mindedness. None of the other four traits – extroversion, neuroticism, agreeableness and conscientiousness – was altered.

Under controlled scientific conditions, researchers gave 51 adults either psilocybin or a placebo in up to five eight-hour sessions. They were told to lie on a sofa with their eyes covered and listen to music while focusing on an "inner experience".

Their personalities were screened after each drug session and also about a year later. Of the 51, 30 had a mystical experience, after which their openness scores rose, and remained higher for up to a year after the tests. The 21 who did not have a mystical experience showed no change.

Wednesday, 3 April 2013

6 Steps To Fall Asleep Fast


Can't get a good night's sleep? You're not alone. In surveys of what would improve people's lives, a good night's sleep frequently comes near the top of the list.
Poor sleep results in worse cognitive performance, including degraded memory, attention, performance and alertness. And in the long term insomnia is also associated with anxiety and depression. And people's sleep gets worse as they get older. After 65 years old, between 12% and 40% of people have insomnia.
All sorts of methods have been tried to combat poor sleep, from drugs through psychological remedies to more outlandish treatments.
The problem with drugs is that they have side-effects and are often addictive. The problem with the more outlandish treatments is that although they tend not to have side-effects, we don't know if they have any effect at all. Psychological remedies, though, combine the best of both worlds: studies show they work without side-effects.
Stimulus Control Therapy
Professor Richard R. Bootzin has been researching sleep disorders for many years at the University of Arizona Sleep Research Lab. Writing in the Annual Review of Clinical Psychology, he describes the different psychological approaches that have been used to treat insomnia (Bootzin & Epstein, 2011).
Of these the most successful single intervention is called Stimulus Control Therapy (Morin et al., 2006). You'll be happy to hear it consists of six very straightforward steps. If you follow these it should improve your sleep. After the list I'll explain the thinking behind them. First, here are their six steps:
1. Lie down to go to sleep only when you are sleepy.
2. Do not use your bed for anything except sleep; that is, do not read, watch television, eat, or worry in bed. Sexual activity is the only exception to this rule. On such occasions, the instructions are to be followed afterwards, when you intend to go to sleep.
3. If you find yourself unable to fall asleep, get up and go into another room. Stay up as long as you wish and then return to the bedroom to sleep. Although we do not want you to watch the clock, we want you to get out of bed if you do not fall asleep immediately. Remember the goal is to associate your bed with falling asleep quickly! If you are in bed more than about 10 minutes without falling asleep and have not gotten up, you are not following this instruction.
4. If you still cannot fall asleep, repeat step 3. Do this as often as is necessary throughout the night.
5. Set your alarm and get up at the same time every morning irrespective of how much sleep you got during the night. This will help your body acquire a consistent sleep rhythm.
6. Do not nap during the day.

Why it works

This method is based on the idea that we are like Pavlov's drooling dog. We attach certain stimuli in the environment to certain thoughts and behaviours. Famously Pavlov's dogs would start drooling when a bell rang, because they associated hearing the bell with getting food. Eventually the dogs would drool at the sound of the bell even when they didn't get any food. Replace the bell with a bed and food with sleep and conceptually you're there.
If we learn to do all kinds of things in bed that aren't sleep, then when we do want to use it for sleep, it's harder because of those other associations.
This is just as true of thoughts as it is of actions. It's important to avoid watching TV in bed, but it's also important to avoid lying in bed worrying about not being able to get to sleep. Because then you learn to associate bed with worry. Worse, you suffer anticipatory anxiety: anxiety about the anxiety you'll feel when you are trying to get to sleep.
So, this therapy works by strengthening the association between bed and sleep and weakening the association between bed and everything else (apart from sex!).
Other treatments supported by the research are progressive muscle relaxation, which is exactly what it sounds like, and paradoxical intention. This latter technique involves stopping people trying so hard to get to sleep. The paradox being that when people stop trying so hard, they find it easier to fall asleep.
All this assumes you don't live next door to a late night drummer and you're not downing a double espresso before hitting the sack, but those sorts of things are pretty obvious. Everything else being equal, though, Stimulus Control Therapy seems the easiest for most people to implement.


Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Video: Brainwashed To Kill. The Assassin